"We are not limited by what we don't have. We are limited by what we don't use." -Bob Goff

Lately in my conversations with people there is a recurring theme: shift.
More specifically, the need/desire/want for a shift in...something.

What I am noticing in these interactions is how often we get caught in the false belief that shift happens outside of us. Meaning, we are looking to something or someone outside of ourselves to make it better so to speak. We often waste energy suffering while we "wait". We feel stuck, agitated, depressed. It's a rabbit hole that we can get lost in, and drag others down with us, if we are not mindful.

Here's what I want to suggest.
Instead of looking and waiting for the shift to happen on the outside (i.e: job, home, relationship, financial situation, family, etc), look inside.

Let me explain.
When we shift our perspective and look within, we prevent further energy drain in the form of suffering. We open ourselves to receive clarity about what we can do. We move from ego/lack mindset to divine/prosperity mindset.
As we move from lack to prosperity, we discover we have what we need inside of us to take action. The energy shifts from dis-connected /dis-empowering to connected / empowering.

Why is this internal shift important? 
Shifting our awareness within helps us access the deeper "I", which is the place of stillness some experience during meditation, writing, running... When we access the deeper "I" we bring together the dimension of stillness and thinking. This process opens the doorway to empowered action. Insights and choices arise that were once blocked when we were caught in ego/lack mindset.

Personal Example:
I don't have children, yet. For a long time, I didn't want children. I chose to focus on building my career  and becoming an "adult" myself to say the least!
Today, I want children in my life. I am open to how that happens.
At times when people ask me about having children, and then hear I am 43, etc, etc, it can be "depressing" --- if I allow myself to get caught in the belief of what I don't have...children. 
Sometimes I create my own suffering with thoughts about not have/will never have/impossible etc.
Following me? I trust some of you understand what I am saying here. Pretty much when we focus on what we don't have, and think we ought to have, whatever that is, we suffer. The greater the gap between what we don't think we have...and what we want...the greater the suffering. So, let's mind the gap and work to reduce and close it so we return to inner peace (soul congruence - more on this another time)

In talking with people and reflecting on my own inquiry about children, I realized it makes so much more sense to focus on what we can do about it!  I am a triple Leo so action is in my blood anyway. 

When I began shifting my attention inward, accessing the "deeper I", I got clear on what I am not using in my desire to have children in my life. From this I realized I want to help foster families deal with challenging feelings and navigating the parent/child relationship. Relationships are one of my favorite topics and I have many tools to offer in service to this. Voila. Stillness. Clarity. Action. 

If you are feeling the suffering of wanting something outside of you to shift, please, stop it. Try what I have explained here. Shift your focus within. Access the "deeper I". Discover what have within right now that you can use in service to what you want to shift outside. Then take empowered action. Be patient. Everything is a process.

​Namaste.

The Reality of Suffering by Stephanie
 
Last week I wrote about being in control. I talked about taking more responsibility for what we can control (our actions/behavior) and not worrying so much about the thoughts and emotions that arise, which are beyond our control.

What are you noticing?

This week I write about the reality of suffering.

Why suffering?
Suffering is one of our greatest teachers. Much of our suffering comes from living in fear / wanting to control.
More suffering happens as we continue to resist what is.

This topic is broad. I will try and keep it simple by asking you to consider 2 questions over the next week as you live your daily life.
Remember, living life is a practice and can be the most powerful portal for spiritual awakening, growth ...and freedom.

1. Is this suffering I am experiencing self made?

2. Is this suffering I am experiencing part of life?

How will you know?

For question #1, self made suffering is a result of our thoughts and emotions and the inner narrative/story we replay over and over. Thoughts feeds emotion and emotion feeds thought and before we know it, this cycle of suffering becomes a way of life. This inner narrative, often a part of our dysfunctional mental conditioning over years, keeps us regretting the past and worried about the future.

The result? We remain stuck in the present, which is in direct opposition to "how life works" and quite frankly why we were born. Life only takes place in the present. Life itself requires us to keep moving. We can choose to move, or life will move us on its own terms. 

Please note: I am not saying to discard the lessons of the past. Nor am I saying to leave the future open to some woo woo practice of intention setting without action.

What I am saying...is what I always say...take responsibility for your life. Your choices. Where you are. Where you want to go. And by all means, take small daily actions to move you along.

For question #2, part of life's inevitable suffering is the pain we feel from loss of a loved one, an illness, tragedy, etc.

If this writing resonates, perhaps you will keep a journal and at the end of each day, spend a few minutes reflecting the 2 questions.

I am with you my friends.
Namaste,
​Stephanie

Summer is the perfect time to slow down and notice where you need to be "fed", aka, practice self care.

Our Top 3 Picks Here at Bronxville Wellness Sanctuary:
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​Massage- From therapeutic and deep tissue massage to relaxing massage, it's one of the oldest healing modalities. Massage can relax muscles, soothe aches and pains, release energy blockages, rejuvenate body, mind and spirit.

Meditation- Stephanie likes to say, we get 2 choices: medicate or meditate. From managing stress, anxiety, and PTSD to cultivating a deeper sense of inner peace and well-being, meditation can help. 

Reiki- Energetic healing technique that works holistically on the body, mind and spirit from the inside out. Reiki energy breaks up and flushes out energy blockages thereby re-balancing the body’s complex energy systems and opening the channels for the body to heal itself.

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